[“Don’t Tell Me Your Major Theme” By Malena Ramnath]
Malena: Malena Ramnath: Hi guys, my name’s Malena Ramnath.
Allison: I’m Allison Rhee.
Malena: We are your hosts and juniors at Northwestern. This is Don’t Tell Me Your Major, an interview show where we don’t get to know people on a superficial level. We ask questions such as their major, whereabouts, and how many years they’ve been living. Instead, we try to get to know them more deeply. This is how you get to know someone better than judging them on the basis of pre-existing stereotypes. So, last time listeners, two years ago, – if you can believe it – we had our last podcast about Valentine’s Day. We asked. “What did you do for Valentine’s Day?,” “Do you believe in soulmates?,” “What’s your favorite romantic movie, love song, and flower?,” “Is love at first sight real?” But now Allison and I are in very different places in our lives, cuffed now to two different men than we were with two years ago, in long term relationships, and I’d just say things have changed. I wanted to re-examine Valentine’s Day. How have our views changed? How has our view of it changed? Based on our new experiences, how has our view on love changed? Let’s start by asking you how you celebrated Valentine’s Day this past year.
Allison: Allison, Valentine’s Day comes a week after my one-year wedding anniversary. So we went out. Valentine’s Day this year was on Monday. We decided to keep things low-key because the Superbowl was Sunday. We ordered a sushi party platter and then had chocolate covered strawberries while watching The Haunting of Hill House. So it was… it was really casual.
Malena says: I can’t stomach horror movies so I don’t understand why it’s so cute. But, it’s not true. It’s like “Oh, I’m scared”You get cuddles. Horror movies are my worst nightmares. They give me terrible nightmares. I appreciate a casual Valentine’s Day.
Malena: Valentine’s Day is for me. I’m posh so I’ll accept any opportunity to have him spend money. So we decided to go and eat at Etta, which is a River North restaurant that I’ve wanted to visit for years. On Valentine’s Day, I get a call from my boyfriend letting me know that he had tested positive for COVID. I was confirmed positive two days later. We’ve been in quarantine now for two weeks. Just got out of quarantine, recorded this podcast, and we’re going tomorrow for dinner.
Allison: Oh, that’s nice.
Malena: Yeah. Instead, he sent me to my hotel room, where he had sparkling juice, chocolate covered strawberries, and like my favorite icecream delivered to me. He also gave me some roses, which I thought were really cute.
Allison: Sparkling juice?
Malena: Yeah, sparkling. Yeah. I mean, I’m under 21. He isn’t, but he had it delivered to me. And so what, you know, based on – I had chocolate, we both had chocolate covered strawberries –but what do you think is the best Valentine’s Day food to get or receive? Chocolates, edible arrangements? Chicken wings?
Allison: Chicken wings? I would – probably not. I mean, I like chicken wings. I don’t know if they would be a good idea for Valentine’s Day. I am not a chocolate lover. I don’t eat chocolate bars. Chocolate covered strawberries are my favorite, but they’re too expensive when you buy them. Some rustic homemade chocolate covered strawberries, I think that’d be, that’s the perfect gift.
Malena, I do appreciate your favorite ice cream. It’s Cherry Garcia, Ben and Jerry’s, listeners – in case you ever want to hit me up with some gifts for your loyal host. I also enjoy edible arrangements. It’s almost like you get the feeling of having a beautiful set of flowers, but it is edible. It’s practical. They don’t just sit on your shelf, and then die like flowers. They come with chocolate covered strawberries, like pineapples, and such. So…
Allison: I can make that for you for about half the price.
Malena: If only you could. Allison, it’s the price you pay for your time.
Allison: That’s true.
Malena: That’s what the issue is. Now, let’s take it a step further. How do you think about love? Hi, Noah! Sorry, I’m trying my best to be best friends. But you have been in a relationship for about a year. Friday marks my two-year mark. How do you think love changes in a relationship of one to two years?
Allison: In the beginning of a relationship it’s more like butterflies. I’m shy. I am so nervous around you. I like to look and act my best. This might be possible in a shorter relationship. When you reach a point where you’ve been together over a year, or two years, it’s hard to hide these things about yourself. It’s almost like they need to see you exactly as you are. That’s why I feel like – I’ve read this like, I listen to this podcast or some Tiktok about how around this six month mark or one year mark that’s when a lot of couples break up because like you can’t avoid who you are at that point. You’ll soon realize that you don’t love your partner if you are like that. I believe that love changes and you feel more comfortable and real with your partner the longer you are together.
Malena, Yeah, I’m sort of at that point too. This is my first relationship that has been for a really, really long time. It’s the first time that I’ve reached a point where it’s not just your best friend at a particular point. It’s like, it’s just like, there’s still some romantic, I’m attracted element there. It’s more like your best friend. Like, I just want you to come home and have a good gossip in bed beside me. I don’t want any other activities after that. That’s definitely an element. It’s also interesting to me how easy it is to get too comfortable. You have to remember to keep it interesting. It’s all weird. Like, I’m 20. I didn’t expect to need to add spice to anything. It’s funny how quickly you get into your routines. Even at such an early age. But the next question is, do friendships work the same way? Like, because when you’re first – I felt like when I was first thinking about this – when you’re first friends with someone, you’re like, worried about hurting their feelings, like tiptoeing around them, but then you get so comfortable, you can kind of just say and do whatever.
Allison: I think so. I think relationships in general mirror each other, just as friendships and romantic relationships. I think one thing is like, you have a lot more like – how do I say this – you’re probably aren’t as invested in the little small things about your friendship as you are in a relationship. You get the idea. I remember being friends with a friend for a long time and then realizing that I was not as invested in our friendship. “Oh, we’re not that compatible,”It’s not the end. You can still be friends and maintain a close friendship with someone like this. However, once you reach a place where you feel like you, you can have a romantic relationship. “Oh, I don’t think we’re that compatible.”It’s like, you have to end it. It’s not always as casual.
Malena, It’s hard to get out of it. It’s almost as if there was a sudden rupture. Yeah, I can see how that’s different. Um, okay. As I spend more time with college friends, I find myself thinking more about this. Because I feel like… some of my guy friends, I spend a lot of time with them, too, and like, they have their quirks and I’m like, “Okay, I can forgive this now. But if I just met you, and you were doing this, I don’t know.”Do you see what I’m referring to?
Allison: Oh, yeah, it’s true. It’s almost like you’re fine with it because they’re familiar with you.
Malena: Okay. But on a lighter note. To wrap it all, let’s go on a lighter note. For the listeners out here, if you would like to take your girls on date, we would be grateful. Because, you know what? A free evening on the town. Always, always appreciated.
Allison: You can take Malena outside.
Malena: I mean… Allison! Okay, but this is my last question. What is your favorite date you haven’t been on yet?
Allison: Um, I think I’d really like to travel somewhere. I guess it’s more of a trip than a singular date. I think it would be great to travel to a new place, as I’d love to. A little more low-key, a cooking class.
Malena: A cooking class would be cool. I feel like it would be…
Allison: I do love cooking.
Malena : It might be a bit cringy. You know, if you’re in a strange crowd. You know?
Allison: Ah, what do you think of old people?
Malena: You can’t discriminate against elderly people, I don’t think so. Perhaps you could say, “Karen”, for want of a better term. You know, who’s like, “How do I do this? How do I do this?”
Allison: Oh, that’s true.
Malena: Do you know what I mean?
Allison: Perhaps an advanced cooking class.
Malena, I mean that Allison is likely to go to culinary school in the future. So…
Allison: We’ll see.
Malena: That’s what she’s been referring to for a while. You never know, it might happen so she can take on the advanced one. I’ll be in beginners trying to make an omelet. I think my ideal date…Oh, I always really wanted to go to a Michelin star restaurant. If any of my listeners truly loves my podcast, and wishes to donate to Malena’s Alinea fund, please do so. I know. Allison, thanks anyway.
Allison: Thank you.
Malena: We are so happy to have you back. We are finally able to have her back after she was away. Hannah will be back in the near future. Once again, this podcast is North by Northwestern. Everyone, happy Valentine’s Day!
Allison: Happy Valentine’s Day
[“Don’t Tell Me Your Major Theme” By Malena Ramnath]